5 The main reasons for self-doubt. Having studied the requests of my clients, I collected statistics for 5 years and identified 5 main reasons for people’s insecurity. They I also share with you in this article. Reason number 1: ignorance of yourself. We live in a world of many roles, which in psychology are called identities. Each person during his life lives several roles: son or daughter, student, worker, lover, mistress, husband, wife and many others.Behind these roles, the person no longer particularly remembers who he really is, because he is identified with them. The consequences of this are: if a person, for example, identifies with his firm and says: “My firm is me or I is my firm, it’s easy to imagine what will happen to him if his company goes bankrupt. A person will perceive the collapse of the firm as their personal collapse. It is identification with roles that makes self-confidence vulnerable. What to do? It is necessary to be discredited: there is I, and there are my roles. Separately. A good example is George Soros – earned several billion dollars, then lost them, then earned again. The question is why did not he fall into a monstrous depression when he lost everything? Or worse, did not commit suicide? Because he intuitively knows this principle: “I am not my money, I’m not my job. I am me”. When you understand, that you are something certain – the confidence in yourself naturally increases. A sense of certainty increases self-confidence.Reason number 2: lack of meaning in life. “If you do not know where you’re going, then what difference do you get” (c) Cheshire Cat, Alice in Wonderland. ” Most people live their lives, having a very vague idea of ??why they live. This leads to a loss of motivation, so you have to force yourself, do something, and work does not satisfy. And what kind of self-confidence can there be if a person does not understand why all this is necessary. Knowledge of your Mission and Purpose fills the life of a person with meaning, a huge amount of energy appears, the question of motivation is no longer worth it, and the person feels that he lives. For menthe knowledge of your Mission is especially important, because there is nothing more attractive to a woman as a man who burns with a passion for life. For women, the knowledge of their Mission is equally important – a woman blossoms, because she expresses her best qualities, allowing her femininity to appear outward. Living with the awareness of your Mission is not a stupid imitation of others – it is an opportunity to manifest yourself in this world in the best way, to feel the real joy of how the world opens to meet a person who understands why he lives. This gives a powerful self-confidence. Reason number 3: live on the “head.”The modern world requires more and more mental expenses, we have to take everything into account, control everything, do everything “from the head”. The person who has got used to live a head, perceives all rationally, logically …. And it is a little lifeless. This is one of the main reasons why people complain about the lack of joy in life. Women are familiar (at least intuitively) feeling when it is unbearably boring to be with a man, constantly analyzing everything and calculating, coming extremely rationally to every situation. It’s understandable: after all, all energy is in the head, and this is not the sexiest part of the body :))) Agree there is a difference: a man who thinks he wants a woman and a man who PHYSISLY feels a powerful sexual desire for a woman.Now numerous studies in the field of studying the human psyche confirm that our body is not just a mechanical shell for carrying organs. The body can think, however esoteric it might sound. The body is the authorized representative of intuition and the channel for its manifestation. What happens to a person when he begins to feel his body? In addition to obvious things, such as increased intuition and sensitivity, there is also a feeling of greater joy from life, when we begin to experience the world holistically, and not just the head. But the body needs to work properly. The stronger a person feels, the more he feels self-confidence. Reason number 4: ignorance of your values.What is important to you? Ignorance, and most importantly the conflict of values, brings chaos into a person’s life. A person can start businesses and throw them. Ignorance of one’s values ??leads to internal conflicts that disorganize behavior. What kind of self-confidence can there be if a person does not know what is important to him and what does not. People destroy families for the sake of building a career or, conversely, do not build a career for the sake of preserving the family. And all we had to do was to correctly prioritize ourselves, as a result of which it would be possible to avoid the problem of choosing between two equally important areas of life. The sooner a person sorts out his values, the faster his peace and certainty will settle in his soul. And there’s confidence in yourself. Reason number 5: personal boundaries.We are social beings and we have to interact with others. We mutually influence each other. This influence is positive or not. It is the knowledge of its borders that makes it possible to make a positive impact even more useful, while simultaneously reducing the negative impact. A sign of our weak borders is the situation where we can not say NO to a person who is uncomfortable with us. When we are charged with communicating with such people, we go to the other extreme – we close completely and drive away other people from ourselves. The ideal solution is to create healthy borders with selective permeability, this sort of “second skin”. You are simultaneously open to people who like you, and at the same time intuitively avoid people (or they themselves bypass you) that you need something from. Over time, you are changing the circle of acquaintances – you are increasingly communicating with positive people and less with negative ones. Self-confidence is steadily gaining momentum.